Memoirs - Memory 3

CREDITS: Germaine for telling me in general what goes on in the mind of a girl that I as a boy could not understand even if it were explained in detail to me for three days (Nobody said males could not write romance novels)I will be writing in a gal's viewpoint. This essay is rated Appropriate for All Ages.

I was hugging ÆSEN in gratitude, and in fondness. He saved me and the class from imminent danger, in such a professional manner too; it was beyond my control when all my feelings for him rushed out and expressed themselves with a hug and a blush. His body was grimy with sweat and blood, but he saved us all, the whole class.

ÆSEN's father commended him for his prowess in combat, while the whole class was looking ant both the father and son in shock. I was also shocked though. Where did ÆSEN learn to fight and defend lives like that? The more I looked at him, the more malevolent and mysterious he looked. Somewhat like the calm aquamarine blue sea, with secrets under its depths, ready to unleash a tidal wave at full force anytime. In fear, I slowly released my arms from his lean and well-toned waist.

ÆSEN, for the next few days, began to withdraw himself from the class even more. It was strange, as from what I gathered he has never seen his father before, until about three days back. He... he should be happy right? What has happened to him? Out of care, I approached him during the lunch break and tried to find out what was wrong.

Things did not go as planned. I thought I had mustered enough will-power and courage to talk to him. However, being a girl, my heart-rate shot up.

'Er-erm, hey' I stammered, forcing a confident smile to my face.

ÆSEN looked genuinely surprised when I sat next to him, trying to talk to him. That was when I realized that I was sitting a hair's breadth away from him. I abruptly backed off.

'What's wrong? You have tied your sandwich lunch into a knot.' ÆSEN commented.

I looked down and saw my butter sandwich tied up like a rock candy wrapper. Oh, I am such a genius, I brushed away the subject, and rushed straight into the point, which made things even harder for myself.

'Well, you do not seem to be in top form, what is wrong?' I said slowly trying to show the concern in my voice instead of the nervousness.

ÆSEN was not offended but was quite open, to my relief. He explained things to me briefly which made me want to pull him close to me and tell him all would be fine. However, I did not think I could do that.

'It's my family. I have a tragic and... complicated family history that would be best kept secret. I really do not know who I am, or what my life should be anymore.'  ÆSEN shook his head as his shoulders drooped.

'Meet me in the park at three o'clock tomorrow.'

'What?'

'I said, meet me at the park tomorrow!' I said slightly louder, mustering my courage. Heads turned. My courage ran away like a coward.

Blushing, I tried to keep my voice a little bit softer from then on, while ÆSEN looked at me quizzically. He assented and left the table. The bell rang.

At three o'clock, I proceeded to the park. The scenery was great there, and this was the first time I noticed it. Lush greedn trees whispered secrets to each other through the rustling if their leaves, birds were chirping random songs that somehow seemed good when heard. The lamposts were off and the light-brownish road was faintly litted by the sunset rays of light. ÆSEN was sitting on a wooden bark bench, reading a book.

'Hi,' I called.

ÆSEN turned and acknowledged me. He closed his book and did not mind as I sat beside him.

'Peaceful day, right?' He asked.

'Agreed,' I replied.

'So what do you want to talk about?' ÆSEN asked,'I have a ... family to attend to.'

'W-well, I just wanted to know what has happened. Why are you so troubled? When did you learn to fight to protect lives like that?' I stammered and asked.

'That is... Not something you want to know.' ÆSEN muttered,'I skirt on the sides of the law. If you value your life, please, do not come close to me that much anymore.' He held his face in his hands in dejection.

I stared at two bluebirds singing and tried to think of what to say. Before they flew away, I felt myself flying. The trailwind rushed along my legs and my hair trailed behind me. ÆSEN was carrying me, with his hair caught in the draft and his transparent scarf running along with the wind. In his wolf fur-coat and transparent scarf, he looked simply dashing.

Not to mention fatal and dangerous.

His eyes had the Ace of Spades symbol as the pupil, when I realized they were contact lenses. ÆSEN put me down and turned to face the danger. Several thugs, about twelve of them, were wielding hand knives, attempting to rob us. ÆSEN knew. Considering the fact I am a female, things could have been a lot worse for me. As those thugs advanced toward us, ÆSEN drew a scythe. About two metres long, with a wicked blade that could slice air standing at ninety centimetres. My mind and body instintively inched away from that harbringer of death. 

ÆSEN began slashing our assailants mercilessly with the scythe. Despite my admiration as he took out the terrorists in school before, This time I could not stand the bloodlust and the fatality of what he was doing. It was too brutal. I am a girl, I prefer innocent and cute stuff, while trying to find my dream life-partner. I looked for attitude and sensitivity in a male. However, what ÆSEN was doing was ... too much for me.

'STOP!' I yelled.

ÆSEN froze his blade as he was bringing it on a downward slice. When the thugs began to back off and run for their lives, I walked toward him and did something I never thought I would have ever done. I slapped ÆSEN, hard.

Surprisingly, ÆSEN did not look in disbelief or in hurt. He seemed to know what was coming, and he just accepted it. 

I started raising my voice at him, and I did not know what words came out of my mouth. I was too angry. Too concerned, too sorry. I finally stopped after a period of time and began to speak in a quiet voice to him.

'ÆSEN, please... Tell me what is wrong. You are much more different since I met you.' I sobbed to him. 'The ÆSEN I knew was caring and compassionate, willing to give others a second chance. However, now you seem troubled. Torn apart, uncertain and brutal. Please... Tell me what is happening, I will try to help.'

ÆSEN had a lost look in his eyes for a moment, and turned away from me. Not in pride or in rejection, but in the feelings or uncertainty and dejection. What I said later made everything worse for him.'ÆSEN, I am sorry. You... you are on a different level from me. A different status. We are not supposed to be together.' I said this, and I could not believe I did, and I regretted it.

ÆSEN carried on walking in the moonlit path, head down and hands in his pocket. 'ÆSEN, I am coming to help you soon. Just give me time.' I thought to myself.With a jolt, something awakened in me. I felt... smarter. More empathetic and with the ability to sympatize and to know what others are thinking and feeling better. As I looked at ÆSEN walking away, I could see the aura of fear and dejection emnating from his being. I could see some affection for me in him, something I never knew and was oblivious to. I resolved to help him all the more. ÆSEN disappeared into the shadows in dejection and rejection. We did not end up together. I planned to remedy that.